May 7 , 2007

Trust Me!

For the last several months I have been studying Experiencing God by Dr. Henry Blackaby. If you have never studied it or experienced God through it I encourage you to do it soon. If you really desire to have a loving, growing, strong relationship with God get this workbook, read it, pray and do the exercises. It answered questions that I did not know that I had. For the last several years I have found myself in a struggle with regard to some of the promises God has made to me. Maybe you have never experienced that. I know the easiest thing to do is just to blow it off and say, oh well I just got that part wrong. Well I learned that every true believer, called by God, everyone He has invited to join Him in the work experiences something called a crisis of belief. I could not believe there was a name for my struggle and yours also.

As I continued to study things started happening and I felt like I was losing everything. Nothing made sense and nothing appeared to be coming together. The things God was so clear about were beginning to become foggy, a blur. Then the Word of the Lord came to me and God said, go to Proverbs 3:5-6. If you are not familiar with that scripture it says, 5Trust in the Lord with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding. 6 Seek his will in all you do, and he will show you which path to take.

What is the scripture saying to me and to you?

Can you just trust Me?
When it doesn’t look like you think it should can you trust Me?
When the light appears to be going out on the dream I gave you and the promise I made to you, can you trust Me?

I found myself at a place of being honest before the Lord. There were some promises God made to me that I had become afraid would never come to pass and I had done some things to try to help them along. I had put my hand on it. I had trusted the opinions of men and women rather than continuing to stand on the Word of the Lord. I was sharing with a sister over the weekend and God quickened my spirit and brought back to my remembrance His promise and the specific details of the promise.

As I was studying Experiencing God the final chapter of the workbook, Dr. Blackaby asked several questions and sent me away to pray. Later in the day I sensed such a love for God, a need to trust Him but I was also fearful. I know that sounds contradictory, but those were my real feelings. The tears began to flow and God did not care that I was at work, He was ministering to my heart, to my unfulfilled dreams and promises that I could not see coming to fruition in my natural eye.

My heartfelt and honest prayer and cry to the Lord was:

God, I am afraid, but I trust You. You have set a plan for my life and while I don’t see it coming together in my natural eye, I know that You are doing something even when I can’t see it. I am scared and I thank You that You love me so much that I can be real with You about it. I feel like a baby sleeping in the room unsure of her surroundings. You are the only one I can depend on. There is no one to call. No one to ask except You. It’s just me and You. I know You have been waiting for me to reach this point of total dependence and surrender to You, not on my friends, mentors, family members or prayer partners. Hold me Daddy. Let me sit in Your lap while You tell me everything is going to be okay and You will tell me what to do.

I heard the Lord, clearly speak to my spirit:
Trust Me Angela. Trust Me My baby girl, My daughter. I have you. I was just waiting for you to realize and say what I have been waiting to hear. You don’t have to have all of the answers for Me. Just lay back in my arms and let Me finish the work I started. Let Me bring the promises I made to you to pass. Let Me hold you and wipe away your tears. Everything you have gone through is part of the test to see if you really trusted Me. It will all be part of your testimony. Just sit here in My lap and let Me do it. Trust Me!!!

As you read this, I don’t know where you find yourself today, but I encourage you to climb up into His lap, be honest with Him about how you really feel about everything, because He already knows and He is just waiting for you to say it out of your mouth. Just trust Him. He knows what His plan for you is and He knows where the potholes and the bumps are because they were all part of His plan. Remember that nothing happens that He does not allow. Trust Him!!!!

   Weekly Scripture:

Proverbs 3:5-6: Trust in the Lord with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding. Seek his will in all you do, and he will show you which path to take.

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