November 19 2007

Transformed & Upgraded, But Not Yet Arrived! (Part 2)

A friend once told me that I was beautiful, inside and out. I heard the words and may have even thought I was a little cute on some level. As I look back at the videos on The Fitness Angel Website I see that there was an entire part of me that was hidden or missing. That part of me was hidden behind my spirituality. Hidden behind my church work. A woman that needed to be brought out of a cocoon.

If you have been around the ministry for any amount of time, you will know I have come a long way from the hurt and anger I once carried. God had dealt with all of that and honestly I thought I was okay. I did not see what was missing. As the title of this segment says, there has been some transformation and upgrading in my life and in yours, however we have never and will never completely arrive. There will always be something that is not quite right because we are not perfect. You have heard me talk about the total package, but I will never refer to myself or anyone else as the perfect package because that only exists in our minds.

We are constantly evolving and changing. What was good last month or last year will still be changing and evolving next month and next year as we grow spiritually, emotionally, relationally and physically into all that we were destined to be. God will do it to the extent that we will allow Him to do His work.

Was I beautiful inside and out? Now when I look back I realize that my friend saw something in me that I did not see in myself. He saw the me that God had destined me to be. Psalm 139:13-14 says, 13 For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb. 14 I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. He was seeing me through God’s eyes.

I thought I was okay, but when I look back and then look at me now, I understand that I was not where God destined me to be. That was okay for then, but it is a new day and a new season. I was her then because I had to go through what I have gone through to be me now. When I look at me now, I know that God created me and that I am a work in progress. What I am today, the way I look today is still not where God has destined me to be. Next year I will be better than I am this year, because I am a work in progress. I am transformed and upgraded but I have not yet arrived at my final destination.

You and I are evolving into what God wants us to be. He started with the emotions, because they were the thing that would have killed me, and they were killing me slowly. They would have an adverse affect on every other area of my life, my relationships, my spirituality and my physical fitness. I would have hurt someone because of my hurt. A good friend of mine said that “Hurt people, Hurt people”, so God had to start with my hurt or I would have hurt you and everyone else that came in contact with me. We have to be fit from the inside out to do what we need to do personally and for the kingdom.

The work God wants to do in me is still not complete. He is still working on me, in me and through me. The cocoon had begun to open and I thought I was cool, but there was still some pushing that needed to take place to strengthen me, for me to become the total package, God wanted me to become and He is not finished with me yet.

When I saw the old videos I saw myself and please do not take this negatively or be offended. I saw myself as lumpy, dumpy. I knew that there were some women that were insecure as it related to me and as I looked at the video I did not know why and then God revealed to me, they saw me in the spirit also. They saw who He destined me to be they did not see the woman I saw. I asked my friends, why didn’t you tell me. One of them said that was you then, this is you now. He is the one that gave me the idea for this series. That is who I was then. I will give you and opportunity to hear from my friends on another segment. While I know they love me, this was really between God and me.

There was nothing they could say or do to help me get it. The Fitness Angel couldn’t do it for me and neither could anyone else. I use to pray that The Fitness Angel would just lay hands on me and that the anointing God had on his life in the area of physical fitness would be imparted into me and I would get this right. Well that prayer went unanswered it did not work. I had to hear the Word of the Lord that had been spoken over my life. God promised me some things and I had to do my part if I ever expected or intended to receive the promises. There have been some disappointments, but they were necessary for me to get it. God will only do so much. You have got to do what He told you to do.

One of my daughters described my transformation as being from militant to feminine. I would agree. The woman God created me to be is coming forth. Not the prayer warrior, not somebody’s mother, I am beginning to see my feminine side emerge and blessing God all day every day for the way He made me. The things I use to try to hide are now part of who I am and I accept it. I have been recreated, transformed and upgraded and I cannot wait to see what God is going to do with me next.

People who see me now comment on the change. People who saw me on The Fitness Angel videos constantly ask if that is really me? It was, it is not any more, so Fitness Angel you need to change my image.

What brought about the Change?

God’s constantly telling me to trust Him, no matter what I saw.

Realizing that no one could do it for me, I have to do it myself. Not even my good friend the personal trainer could do it for me. He could not impart a desire to exercise into me. Just so you know I workout 4-5 days per week and 2 of those days I am actually leading an exercise class. Look at God.

My disappointment and realization that some of my dreams and the promises of God were on delay because God was waiting for me to be obedient in this area and submit to Him.

The removal of people from my life that I thought I needed.

I do not believe the promises that have been delayed have been denied, because God is still giving me wisdom, vision and victory in those areas. He made promises and I have told you before that the promises of God cannot be stopped only delayed. Your destiny may be on hold but just like He did for me God can restore the vision and the dream. The promises of God cannot be stopped but we can delay them. Check out the story of Joseph in Genesis. He was given a promise/dream and he went through a lot of headache and heartache, but the vision did come to pass.

Going from militant to feminine has been a process. God gave me some very specific instructions and some awesome women of God to walk me through it. We will walk you through what I went through in the upcoming segments so stay tuned.

  Weekly Scripture:

Passage Philippians 3:12-14: 12 -14 I'm not saying that I have this all together, that I have it made. But I am well on my way, reaching out for Christ, who has so wondrously reached out for me. Friends, don't get me wrong: By no means do I count myself an expert in all of this, but I've got my eye on the goal, where God is beckoning us onward—to Jesus. I'm off and running, and I'm not turning back. The Message (MSG)

We just worked out spiritually. If you have not worked out your physical temple get up and put your video in or go for a walk, but do something. Remember to work out at least 3 times per week (20-30 minutes per day) to experience a New Beginning physically. Work out to music, workout and pray. Just workout.

For further discussion contact angela@mynewtemple.org or write to us on the message board